I've been having computer problems lately. I can't seem to figure out what's wrong, and I dread having to put time into researching what the problem is and how to fix it. I also don't want to have to find someone and pay them to fix it. Not to mention time without my computer. How would I survive? Just joking, but I've gotten awfully reliant upon the instant gratification of e-mail and internet.
So basically what I've been doing when the whole thing crashes, is I start it in safe mode and try to repair the problem (which somehow it knows how to do?) Sometimes that works. Other times, I do a system restore, where you can choose (or it chooses) a point where things were working fine and starts you back at that point. For the moment, that seems to work.
Maybe you understand all that, perhaps better than I do. But I was trying to explain to my Mom how it works (not very well, but the key word is trying). When it suddenly dawned on me, what if you could go back and choose a point before your life went astray?
I wonder if I would go back to when I was pregnant, right about to give birth, bearing the weight of my marriage, would I gather up my friends and family and have support that would have made things easier?
I wonder if I would go back to 2001 before I lost my job? Or right afterwards? When I might have made different choices about a career or education?
I wonder if I would go back to early 2001 before Nemo and I found out that we were going to have fertility problems? (this was a particularly good time of our marriage)
I wonder if I would go back to the night of my rehearsal dinner? Would I call the whole thing off?
I wonder if I would go back to before I even met Nemo.
I wonder if I would go back to my pre-diabetes innocent self?
And yet, all these events have made me the person I am. Even more importantly are the recent events that have made Lucian who he is, and I wouldn't change him for the world. It's interesting to think about though.
Where is your system restore point?