The Zoo

Today Lucian and I met Nemo at the zoo. (Nemo hasn't taken advantage of any Saturday parenting time in nine months.)

Lucian was thrilled with all the animals. The last time I took him was a year ago, and he was only about six months old. He got much more out of it today. I cracked up hearing his answer to - what does the monkey say? "ooh ooh ooh" and what does the duck say? "kak kak". Young children are so funny. I'm enjoying every aspect of his life.

Usually when I drop Lucian off for the parenting time with Nemo, it's a quick hello, good-bye and out the door. (I drop off and pick Lucian up because I won't let Nemo drive, but that's another story). So when I suggested going to the zoo today, I afterwards thought that I must be losing my mind. Hours alone with Nemo? What was I thinking?

It was a very strange experience. It was almost like I was transported back three years earlier when we were still together. From the outside I'm sure we looked like a happy couple with a baby. Just minus the wedding rings. He joked with me a bit, and I asked him a few questions. But mostly we just looked at the animals with Lucian.

When we went to leave, we both agreed it had been a nice time. I said - maybe we could do it again when we're free on a Saturday. We'll see. I doubt he's not going to annoy me again anytime soon. But I'll settle for a bit of tolerance and normalcy on a Saturday afternoon.

Edited to add: I've just reread this post and I realize that I've made it seem like I wanted to do it again soon. I am repulsed by Nemo and have no interest in having him be in either Lucian's or my life. The reason I said - maybe we could do it again when we're free on a Saturday, is because I want the visits to be controlled by me. So that I am able to pick the Saturdays that we see Nemo, not have them forced on me.

It was a beautiful day to go to the zoo. It was great seeing Lucian's reaction to the animals. I liked being in control of where we went and how long we stayed. I think it was good for Nemo also. However, I'd rather not do it again anytime soon. I'm still repulsed by Nemo and his behavior. But if I have to (and I'm court ordered to do so), it was a tolerable experience.