Thursday, May 25, 2006

Another one

I want to have another baby.

I know how absurd this is. I have no money, no job, no car. I live with my parents. After years of infertility, I really am satisfied with having just one. Lucian is enough.

But still... I dream of another. These are the things I think about: How cute would Lucian be as a big brother? I'd get more use out of all the baby stuff and maternity clothes. I'd get to experience pregnancy with a clear mind. It would drive Nemo's family crazy. But mostly, I'd love it for me.

I'm a good mother. (and father too) There aren't many things I'd brag and say that I do well. But motherhood is one of them. I think this is why I pushed so hard during the infertility struggles. I knew I'd be a great mom.

I already have an awesome donor, Lucian would have a full sibling, it would only cost me $300 for the sperm sample (that's assuming it worked with one try - it's my dream so I might as well go for the gold, right?)

But it's not a realistic dream at this point in my life. But my heart still dreams about it anyway. If I won the lottery, my first call would be to the fertility clinic.

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