Thursday, June 01, 2006

Reprieve, but...

Last night, we had a reprieve. Nemo called and said that he was stuck at work and wouldn't be able to make his parenting time.

I got Lucian to bed early, and I had a night to myself, so I'm not complaining, but I am wondering. Was Nemo really working late? And, what would I do if I was relying upon him to babysit during that time? What if I had a job?

I believe that Nemo is currently taking advantage of his parenting time because of his family. I don't have it all figured out, but I think it goes something like this: Nemo's parents want to be a part of Lucian's life. (as grandparents, their time is derivative of Nemo's) Nemo can not afford his lifestyle, let alone the child support he has to pay. His parents give him money. They threaten to take the money away if they don't get to see Lucian. So Nemo calls me, and I bring Lucian over and Nemo gets his money.

I feel like it's a big farce. The whole situation is so fake, I can hardly stand it. I'm a sincere and genuine person. I have a hard time lying or pretending. (I'm more likely to not notice your haircut, then to compliment it - you know, the if-you-can't-say-anything-nice rule) And this situation to me is a charade. At some point, it's going to come crashing down.

Some believe (the legal system for one) that any father is better than no father at all. I'm not outwardly arguing this point. But being that Nemo is not the sperm donor and that I have never seen him actually be a father to Lucian, it just feels so fake. I'm repeating myself here. Sorry. How long will I have to tolerate this joke?

And Nemo's already called for tomorrow night. Ugh.

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