What I did about my dilemma

Thanks to everyone that responded with comments about my dilemma.

I ended up doing what everyone suggested. I e-mailed him and said that because I hadn't heard from him, I had already made plans. (My plans were to get Lucian to bed on time, but he didn't need to know that.)

I wrestled with it for awhile, because even though Nemo doesn't deserve it, I'm really trying to work with him rather than against him.

Our parenting time agreement is MWF 5:30 - 8:00. So, Nemo needs to let me know by 5:30 the night before. It's been in effect over a year now. He has all day until 5:30 to call - you'd think that would be a relatively easy task.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, he normally e-mails me in the morning from work. So he's better about the 24 notice then. But on Sundays, it's hit or miss. He never e-mails me on a Sunday, which I don't understand because it seems to me that it would be easier than having to talk to me (or my parents). My theory is that he's out late on Saturdays, and spends Sundays recuperating. I still think he's into drugs.

The strangest part might be his response. I was nervous, as I always am when I have to set boundaries with him. But he e-mailed me this morning and said that he was sorry that he called late, and "wished that it didn't have to be like this". I'm not sure what he meant. I mean, the reason we implemented the 24 hour notice was because of him! He just wasn't showing up for parenting time, and I'd have to sit around and wait for him. This was when I was still living in my old house.

I guess I'll never figure him out.

I felt really good about what I did. Especially hearing from you - it reinforced my decision. Thank you. Stay tuned for more dilemmas of mine... I've got many more!